Woof, woof. It’s only Wednesday and it has been a rough week already. Monday I got shots. I thought I was going for a nice ride. Yeah, I rode, all right–right up to the vet’s office and here they come with that “nice Doggie” talk and a needle!
Then yesterday I sneaked out when My Lady opened the door to look out. Well I paid for that! She didn’t notice I was gone. I scratched on the door and I scratched again and again, hoping that door would open like it sometimes does, and I could sneak in again. I could’ve barked but you know how it is when you’ve been naughty–you hope things work out so it won’t be noticed!
Well, my door scratching finally got My Lady’s attention and she opened the door. That was one surprised person, I can tell you. She just stared at me, so I ran over to my water bowl and then got in my bed and was real quiet. I think she has it all figured out now, but for a while that was one puzzled lady.
Last night was the worst of all. She sits on my couch and I can see that brush and scissors in her hands. That means trouble, folks! I’m a longhaired fellow and have short legs besides. That a bad mix when I’m out trailing the recent varmints that have visited My Lady’s yard. You see, it’s covered with burr clover gone to seed.
No matter how hard I squirmed and how loud I yelped, she wouldn’t turn me loose. All that “nice Doggie” stuff didn’t impress me one bit. That was cruelty to an animal, and if I didn’t like her so much I’d report her. Decided I’d just sulk instead.
Then she gives me a treat–the hardest, toughest think I’ve ever had in my mouth. Delicious, though. She followed that with a dog biscuit and I thought I’d just save it for a while. Have you ever tried burying a treat in a place with a rock floor? When I head for the little planter box, I get yelled at. If I try to move the sofa pillows, I get yelled at again. After I pretended to give up and go to sleep she forgot about me and I put my treat in my special place between the cushions and the sofa back. 
It’s still there this morning but I didn’t have a chance to enjoy it. I got an invitation for another car ride. Now, that’s something I can’t resist. Say “car” and I’m at the door in a split second. This one ended at the groomer’s, so you can imagine what I had to go through to get this new look. When it was all done and they put me in that crate thing to wait for my ride home, I told them exactly what I thought. I reckon she has had enough practice with dogs that she understood every bark ‘cause she picked up the phone and says “I think he wants to go home, now.” She thinks? Huh!
And please, don't even think about offering me another car trip this week.
Woof!
